Today we share the blog with a friend who has walked the tough road of adoption twice. As a result her family has two beautiful miracles and a Faith that is tried and strong. I pray for you today if you are struggling with infertility, praying about adoption, or are in the middle of your trek on the rough terrain. May this post touch your heart as it has touched mine and may you find Hope for your journey.
(The writer chooses to remain anonymous for the protection of her precious babies.)
After being married for two years, my husband and I decided that we wanted to start a family. We began to pray that God would allow us to conceive. After several years, we decided to see a fertility doctor. After talking about our desire to conceive, the doctor told us that with my medical issues and the medical issues that my husband had, at best, he said that we would have about a 50% chance of conceiving with fertility. He said that my husband would have to come off of the medication he had been taking for quite some time and take the risk of becoming sick before he would even consider helping us medically. My husband, knowing how badly I wanted to be a mother looked at me and said, “We can try.” Without hesitation, I told him and the doctor that there was no way I would risk him becoming ill again and losing him in the attempt to conceive. He then immediately told us that he was very much an advocate for adoption.
We both left the doctor’s office that day feeling empty and hopeless in regards to becoming parents. After all, we wanted to conceive and have a child that would epitomize our love by having both physical and personality traits of the two of us.
I remember crying uncontrollably on the way home from the doctor’s office that day. My husband just kept saying that it would be okay. We prayed for nine years that we would be able to have a baby. I never could understand why God wouldn’t answer that prayer…..until one day I encountered a child who had been abused through my job.
To make a long and very sad story short, the guardian signed her over to me until we could locate family members to place her with. My husband and I had discussed adoption, but he was very apprehensive. He was not at all hesitant, however, to accept this child into our home to keep her safe and take care of her until we found her family.
Over the course of the following two weeks, we became very close to this child. He formed an amazing bond with her, and we were devastated when we had to let her go. It was at this point that God changed my husband’s heart. He no longer had any reservations about adoption, and we began to move forward with the process to become adoptive parents.
I remember doing our home study, and the social worker asked us what age child we wanted. We told her that we felt like God was leading us to adopt a younger child, age 0 – 5. She told us that it wasn’t very likely that would happen. We then told her that if it was God’s will, it would. After a lengthy process to become licensed, we just decided that God was at work and that our children would be with us soon. We began to pray for our children and that if they had already been born that God would protect them and bring them safely to us, and if they had not been born that He would protect them in the womb.
We received a call one Friday afternoon from my brother telling me that he had a friend who had a four-year-old niece that was going to have to go into foster care. Within a month, this precious little girl was placed in our home. She was not yet free for adoption but her social worker assured us that the case would be headed in that direction. She filled our hearts with joy, laughter, and happiness. The bond was immediate. She was our little girl.
After she had been with us for about a month, we received another call from our social worker telling us that a baby was going to be born within the next few hours, and the biological parents were going to sign their rights away at birth. We received a call the next morning saying that our son had been born and that he was waiting on his momma and daddy. We all jumped in the car and headed to see our new baby boy. The nurse put him in my arms, gave me a bottle, and told me that he was not a big eater. However, he immediately began to drink the bottle. She said, “He must have been waiting on his mommy.”
We found out just a few hours later that the biological parents had changed their minds and did not want to give him up for adoption. We were of course, devastated, but also knew that God had created this child for us. Both children were soon legally adopted, but we fought the hard fight for an entire year with both children, battling in court for custody, holding special prayer services at church, working with our attorneys and constantly drawing our strength from our God to get us through the uncertain and difficult times. And let me tell you, our God was more than sufficient to meet all of our needs. His strength is perfect when our strength is weak, or in our case, some days just plain gone. I remember praying over our children and refusing to allow Satan to steal our joy of being new parents with trying to worry us that we might have to be without them. We chose instead to give God the victory for what He had done and was doing in all our lives.
These two children do epitomize our love because as we became like Christ when He adopted us, they became like us when we adopted them. There is so much more to this story that I could share, and maybe one day I will share it with the world. But for now, just know that God hears our cries for help, and he pities every groan. Because of that I lift my hands in total praise to Him! Amen.